Winters tale

The Ubumama group was amazing - it was such a joy and a blessing to work with these wonderful women. We had a regular group of 30 who came for 5 days. Here time is very loose - for example 10am might mean sometime today. "Starting at 3pm" for the first session meant that by 5.30 everybody had arrived and so I was somewhat shocked to find for the last four days that if I was later than 3pm, such was the enthusiam of the group that many of them had already arrived, set out the tables and were ready complaining that the Muzungu (white person) was keeping Ugandan time!

Anyway, their stories were incredible - sad and moving tales of difficult births, of illness, of loss of their children, of unsupportive and abusive husbands, of terrible treatment at the hospitals (the nurses hit women in labour to stop them making a noise!! can you believe it?) and yet, through all the difficulties these were some of the warmest, most positive, delightful, encouraging and supportive group of women it has ever been my privilige to get to know. We had a fantastic fime sharing our stories and thinking about their issues, which ranged from malaria whilst pregnant, bad diet, poor transport to the clinics, lack of education - many didnt know how they had become pregnant the first time, fear of the delivery and others including lack of family planning. This is a major issue. Many of the women only wanted 2 or 3 children but most had 4 + with several having 8, 9 or 10 children!!! The men see it as a sign of their virility if they have large nos of kids and will not accept the use of contraceptives whilst the women fear refusing their husbands, loosing their lives in childbirth, the difficulty of delivery and having more mouths to feed on their meagre incomes.

From our story telling sessions everybody designed and embroidered a piece of fabric to symbolise their tale. The results were amazing and they were all so proud of what they achieved. Watch out for this project - I am hoping to repeat it when I come home with a group of willing women..... when Gordon had arrived this week he lead a Health Seminar which the group came to and where we tried to provide some health education to support them. Becaouse of the generosity of a local rotary club we were able to give all the lovely ladies a mosquito net - to their great delight.

Winter came to three sessions and to the health seminar. She had become pregnant last Feb aged 15 and baby Susan who came with her is now 8 months old. At the time she did not know she was pregnant and was surprised when she went into labour (!?) her parents threw her out and her 23 yr old "husband" Peter had taken her in. Now 5 months pregnant with her second child she was a lively, enthusiastic girl keen to learn how to sew, proud of her beautiful daughter and determined only to have 2 children. At the health seminar she bravely stood and asked questions about contraception and was excited to think she might be able to have some control over this. The next day she wasnt at the group! During the night Peter had beaten her up - he was angry that his "wife" had been coming to church, had been learning to sew and had been learning other things as well!! At the group we discussed at length how the women might support Winter and sadly shared their own issues that her dramatic story had brought to light. I visited Winter and she showed me her bruises, Gordon gave her some excercises to do stretch her bruised muscles and we gave her some painkillers to give her some relief. Boldly, she decided she would like to carry on sewing and I took her fabric and some threads to her house along with a mosquito net. I have never seen such thrill as hers when she recieved them. Yesterday they told me she had gone - there had been more abuse and she had left.

I cant describe how sad I have felt about this and other things they have shared with me and yet thier courage, strength and an unswerving faith in a Father God who loves them and cares about all their needs is a lesson in trust that I never expected to learn. I am thrilled that they have decided to continue to meet each week, they will start to think about what they would like a nurse to do for their children - the Kabanda Trust plans to employ a nurse in Lungujja - soon, they will continue to sew, share and support each other and who knows what they will develop.

Last night Pastor Steven and his wife Gladys came for supper at the guest house where we are staying. Gladys brought with her a beautiful woven basket a gift from the women and a letter "we cannot give you much, but we can give you to God and ask him to care for you" I was moved to tears as I am now as I write...... my sisters in Uganda are amazing, courageous women.